Leading as an introvert

There’s a persistent myth that great leaders are charismatic extroverts who energize rooms and rally teams through force of personality. If you’re an introvert considering design leadership—or already in a leadership role and wondering if you’re doing it wrong—let me tell you something: that myth is wrong.

I’ve led teams of 20+ people and now manage consultants remotely. I’ve given talks to hundreds and prefer the Q&A to the presentation. I’ve learned that introversion isn’t a leadership liability—it’s just a different approach.

The energy thing

Being around people drains my energy rather than adding it. This doesn’t mean I don’t like people or can’t work with them. It just means I need to be strategic about how and when I engage.

The magic happens in 1:1 situations. When I’m with one person, I’m not performing for a crowd or trying to manage multiple personalities. I can actually be myself. This is why I’ve always enjoyed what I prefer to call “guiding” people rather than “managing” them.

How I actually handle the energy drain

Meeting limits are non-negotiable. I fight to keep meeting-heavy days to 4-6 meetings maximum. If I have a particularly meeting-heavy day, the next day needs to be almost meeting-free. This isn’t just for recovery—it’s so I can actually do work. I’m still a manager who designs.

Recovery looks mundane. My best recovery days? Building out design system components in Figma. Repetitive, focused work. There’s something restorative about that after a day of complex human interactions.

Slack over Zoom, always. I can process and respond thoughtfully instead of performing in real-time.

”I don’t know” changed everything

Early on, I thought leadership meant having all the answers. The more experience I got, the more I realized how much I didn’t know. And you know what? That honesty builds trust in ways that fake confidence never can.

When someone asks me how I’d solve a complex flow problem, I’ve learned to say “I need to think about that” instead of rambling an immediate response.

But I don’t just say “I don’t know” and delegate it away. I go research it myself. Maybe that’s inefficient, but I need to understand things deeply. That’s how I build the knowledge to actually guide people next time.

Working with your strengths instead of against them

Nobody likes being told what to do. I give people responsibility and autonomy—the same thing I’d want. But I stay tuned in to when they need support. If someone asks for a 5-minute call to talk something through, I drop everything. That immediate availability prevents small issues from becoming big problems.

I’ve always been pretty connected to emotions—mine and other people’s. Turns out that’s useful in leadership, even if it doesn’t look like the stereotypical “commanding” style.

One question that changes everything: In 1:1s with people on my team, I ask “If you had my role, what would you do differently?”

This question is magic because it completely shifts the dynamic. Instead of them feeling like they’re complaining about me or the organization, they’re giving advice to someone in my position. It makes it safe for them to be honest about things that aren’t working.

The responses always surprise me. Sometimes it’s something obvious I’ve been blind to. Sometimes it’s a constraint they don’t understand—and I can explain why we do things a certain way. But often, it’s something I can actually change. The question turns potential frustration into collaboration.

Remote work gets a bad rap

I work remotely now, managing consultants. Sure, I miss some office things—coffee conversations, random discoveries about people’s terrible music taste. But honestly? My personality is much better suited for this.

When I led larger teams in-office, I had to get creative:

• Project meetings instead of department meetings. Rather than cramming all 12 designers into one room, I’d run focused sessions with 3-4 people working on the same project. Less draining, more useful.
• Coffee shop 1:1s were my secret weapon. Informal setting, one-on-one format. No group dynamics to navigate.

The digital watercooler thing is real—it’s harder to check in authentically with people remotely. But it’s also easier to recharge between interactions.

There’s no playbook

Here’s what I wish someone had told me: there’s no right way to lead. You can’t follow someone else’s approach and expect it to work. Leadership has to be authentic to who you are.

You don’t need to be the leader who gives inspiring speeches or “eats last.” You can be the one who listens more than they talk, who creates space for others to shine, who builds trust through honesty.

The design industry could use more leadership styles. If you’re an introvert, don’t try to become an extrovert to lead effectively. Work with your actual strengths, not against them.

I’ve written more about what makes great design managers in this piece about the transition from individual contributor to leadership - including why you shouldn’t make the jump too early.

Your team doesn’t need you to be someone else. They need you to be the best version of yourself.

If you’re an introverted designer thinking about leadership, I’d love to hear about your experience. Send me an email at anton@antonsten.com. I read and reply to every message.